In Praise of Midwives

The term Midwife means 'with woman'.  

What a gorgeous phrase.  With woman.  There are many good Midwives who simply are 'with women'.  They sit and wait.  They understand that women's bodies birth babies and that pizzas are delivered.  They know that babies sometimes take their time in exiting.  There is no rush, no need to speed things along. 

I love Midwives.  I do.  I think that they do an amazing job in a time where such jobs aren't valued.  The loads that they carry make me want to close my eyes and weep.  Too many times the Midwife is running between 3 or 4 women at a time.  Small wonder a dependence on machinery has grown, or has it grown to enable a cutting of staff? <ponders thought, moves on>.  They are overburdened with a huge amount of paperwork and once that's done they have to input it on to the computer.  Small wonder there is no time for the niceties, such as 'oohing' and 'aahing' over the babies, or the oh so important helping, where necessary, with breastfeeding.

So, let me tell you about a Midwife that I really love.  I have been fortunate to attend several births with her.  She is a Birthing Centre, Normal Birth minded Midwife who works on a very busy labour ward.  Now a Midwife like L is normally found amongst the birthing pools and Rebozo cloths.  She told me about another Midwife friend (of hers) that is coming to work on labour ward and what a loss to the Birthing Centre she will be.  And I agree… and then I don't!  Because women in hospitals need Midwives.  They need Midwives that believe in their ability to birth babies.  Midwives who will intervene where necessary and guard Mum's birthing space when it is not, and for that reason, we need Birthing Centre, Normal Birth minded Midwives on Labour Wards.

Anyway… back to L.

I had a lovely mum who, due to her BMI, was not allowed to use the Birthing Centre for her labour and the birth of her child.  Such a shame because she had SPD/PGP and would have benefited from water.  Her labour started slowly.  About ten days before the birth she had a huge show.  It freaked her husband out, but she knew what it was and to keep calm.  She called me for a quick bit of reassurance and then went on with her life.  Her family has a history of quick labours so I was on alert for her. I got a call to ask about some pains she'd been having when her waters went!  So I set off to find her labouring beautifully at home.  Part of my role is to keep my Mums at home for as long as possible.  They tend to know when they need to be in their birthing space, and my presence calms them enough to trust their bodies.  Anyway, she was labouring nicely and because she wasn't ready to go, she suggested that we watch GLEE!  (I'm a BIG FAN).  By the end of the second episode, she was ready to go.

We arrived at the hospital where she had a lovely lovely Midwife, R.  Gently spoken and non intrusive.  H didn't want any vaginal exams which R found unusual.  A doctor came in after a few hours to say "but if you don't have a VE, how will we know what position the baby is in?  How will we know how to plan this birth?".  H was gently insistent that that wasn't what she wanted.  Shortly before R's shift ended we were becoming pretty convinced that things were moving along and coming towards the final stage (pushing).  We had hoped that the lovely R would catch the baby, but it was not to be.  She brought in the Midwife that was taking over and it was the gorgeous L.  She introduced herself to my lovely couple with a big smile.  When she saw me, she gave me a hug and said how good it was to be working with me again.  The pleasure was entirely mutual.

When she heard that H didn't want any VEs, she smiled and said "That's fine.  They're not necessary".  And so we waited, but eventually after H had reached a stage of involuntary pushing and the baby wasn't appearing, she reluctantly asked if she could perform a VE to check the direction that the baby was looking in and determine if the delay was due to positioning.  She said to me afterwards that it would have been so good for the others on the Labour Ward to see that a woman doesn't need VEs and that H had so nearly nearly gotten her wish to not have any.  I will just add that H said that should a VE be necessary, of course she would have one.

L was quiet, unobtrusive and so so gentle.  She regularly monitored the baby's heart rate which was brilliant.  And when the VE showed that the baby was looking sideways, L did all she could to buy Mum more time to shift positions, in the hope that the baby would turn his head back and pop his chin down.  A lovely doctor came in and asked to examine H and agreed with L's assessment and said that if things didn't shift soon, they would have to use instruments.  A second, much less lovely, doctor came in and examined H (again with her permission) but he made her scream. The decision was made that H would have to go to theatre where they would do a 'trial of Ventouse and Forceps'.  I wasn't allowed into theatre, but I knew that H felt safe with L.  A beautiful boy was born, by forceps.

After the birth, L didn't rush to weigh the baby or do anything.  She simply allowed H & S time with their son. 

Why is L one of my favourite Midwives, and why have I singled her out for praise?  Well, she seems to genuinely love women and have faith in their birthing abilities.  She kneels on floors to check foetal heart rates, she works around the Mum.  She doesn't disturb Mum when she's contracting.  She just is.  She is a Midwife.  With woman.